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being blue is better than being over it ([personal profile] gorgeousnerd) wrote in [community profile] firmament2015-07-31 10:38 pm

(i feel them) crash against my skin - One Direction, NC-17, Zayn/Harry.

Title: (i feel them) crash against my skin
Fandom: One Direction
Rating: NC-17.
Length: About 4350 words.
Characters/Pairings: Zayn/Harry.

Summary: They're doing the photo shoot for the On the Road Again tour when Harry says, "Do me."

Zayn, thinking Harry means sex, blinks at him wordlessly until Harry says, "Come on, I'm bored. Wouldn't it be fun if we posed in different bodies?"

Notes: Like One Direction, I'm randomly dropping things I've been sitting on in the middle of the night! This is the second of two stories that I wrote months ago and just...haven't posted before now. I wrote this late winter and intended to edit and post after my 1D Big Bang was up, and, uh. Long story short, that story went up a week after Zayn left the group. I did trim some small things when I finally got to edits, but this is still a Pre-Exit Story.

Thanks to onthehill for looking this over. Anything wrong/weird is all me.

Also on AO3.


(i feel them) crash against my skin


Zayn's known he's had the power for years; he and his sisters used to switch bodies with each other for fun, and then their mum figured out that they were using the opportunity to get each other in trouble in different ways and started collectively disciplining them when anything looked the slightest bit funny. Neither Mum nor Dad had the power, so Zayn wasn't sure where it came from, but his particular branch and generation of the Malik family all have it.

He tells Harry about it a couple times over the years just because he can. He doesn't switch much as an adult, but Harry listens intently each time. Even so, Zayn half-thinks Harry's forgotten about it until they reach 2014; it's been at least a year since Zayn's last mentioned it. They're doing the photo shoot for the On the Road Again tour when Harry says, "Do me."

Zayn, thinking Harry means sex, blinks at him wordlessly until Harry says, "Come on, I'm bored. Wouldn't it be fun if we posed in different bodies?"

It does sound fun, so Zayn tells Harry to close his eyes - not because he doesn't want Harry to see what he's doing, but because Zayn suspects it's disorienting - and wills the switch to happen.

Harry's taller than Zayn, more solid in a couple ways. It's not like kids bouncing around different bodies at all. Zayn pats Harry's body for a moment after he does the switch just to get the feel for it.

"Open your eyes," Zayn tells Harry.

Harry does, and one thing that isn't different from childhood is that he sees Harry looking out from Zayn's own eyes. He suspects Harry sees the opposite because Harry reaches up to cup his own face and pat it a couple times, strokes his own hair from a different body.

"Why don't we do this more?" Harry asks wonderingly, a smile spreading on his face - on Zayn's face - that is just as awe-inspired as his tone. There's also a hint of mischief in his tone, if Zayn isn't wrong.

"Dunno," Zayn says. "Let me know when you want to swap back, yeah? The cravings get pretty bad."

Harry stops touching Zayn and grins even bigger. "I can smoke. Sick."

-

It's more like switching flats, Zayn decides, than it is swapping bodies. He's in a familiar place, but the view is different, and there are loads of ways to make the place your own. It's like drawing the curtains shut when Harry lets all the light in. Shifting around furniture. That sort of thing.

So Zayn plays at being Harry for a bit - which is oddly liberating in its way, borrowing Harry's confidence - until Harry whispers in his ear, "Pose like you would for this next one." They both do, and when Zayn sees the shot later, Harry having rolled up his jersey to expose Zayn's stomach and Zayn pulling his best model face in Harry's body, he laughs for about ten minutes straight. And he falls over because he's not used to Harry's centre of balance.



-

They do it more after that.

It's often for little things. Harry's ill, and he needs a break from his own body. Zayn's exhausted and wants to sleep in a body that doesn't have nicotine flowing through its veins. They both want to prank the other lads. Things of that nature.

Very occasionally, they do take full days as each other, usually when they're not touring. Harry will spend the day with an indulgent Perrie (who also swaps with Zayn occasionally, but generally they do it when they're nowhere near each other and want a moment of connection), and Zayn will go out with Harry's friends, quietly observing them just because he can. He thinks his power hides him in plain sight in some extra way because no one ever notices, and neither Zayn nor Harry are particularly good actors.

Well, no one outside the band notices. Louis figures it out disturbingly fast and demands the same day of the photoshoot to swap with Zayn, too. They swap back within five minutes, both sporting nasty headaches. Some things are sacred, and apparently, Louis's body is one of them.

Zayn swaps with Niall twice, listens to him go on and on about how great Zayn's perspective is and how lucky he is the first time, and he watches Niall get high the second time, giggling like Niall does, but in Zayn's voice. Liam wants no part of it, although Zayn's not sure that will last. He tends to wear down over time.

Harry, though, feels like a second home. They give each other permission to wank off in each other's bodies, and Zayn marvels at the sensitivity of Harry's nipples and how much less stamina he has. Harry mentions later to Zayn that his body is more flexible than Harry expected, and Zayn decides not to ask if he went to Soul Cycle with his body or if he gets creative when he wanks. Some things are better not to know.

-

Except that Zayn gets curious on these walkabouts, usually when he is wanking and testing Harry's limits. What would it be like shagging his own body, when he knows what buttons to press? Would he be able to stay in Harry's body with the distraction? Or Pezza's, if she felt like experimenting? What would it be like shagging his own body with Harry in it?

-

And then, probably inevitably:

What would it be like shagging Harry?

-

Harry looks surprised when Zayn broaches the topic with him.

"I...didn't know you and Perrie had that kind of arrangement," Harry says carefully.

Zayn shrugs. "Didn't matter til now."

There's more to it than that, of course; Zayn's bouncing ability meant he'd had to talk about a lot of different possibilities with Perrie even though their rules were straightforward. There's also the fact that he's fucked up their simple "check in before and after" rule more than once, and he's had to take more care when looking to explore the open parts of their relationship.

(With Harry, it was probably the most simple negotiation yet. "Surprised you didn't ask earlier," Perrie had said. "Have a nice time, love. Full report when you come back." And that was it.)

They meet up at Harry's. Zayn doesn't ring the doorbell; he swaps the two of them when he's standing on the front step and lets Harry in his own house. It's one of their things. Harry loves it every time, and this time's no different...well, except for the way he folds into Zayn's arms and kisses him.

Zayn doesn't kiss people shorter than himself much. He definitely doesn't kiss his own body when he's taller. Zayn plays with the hair on his usual head in the way he likes as he kisses Harry, which makes Harry reach up and tug Harry's hair - Zayn's hair, for the moment - firmly. It makes Zayn curl Harry's toes.

"Bed?" Zayn asks when he draws back for breath.

Harry grins and strips down right there, just as quick in Zayn's body as he is in his own. Zayn has to take a moment to appreciate how weird it all is - he's never seen his naked arse moving from that angle before, after all - before he pulls Harry's jumper over his head.

Zayn pauses once he's inside Harry's bedroom; Harry's turned down the lights, and there's scented candles burning (of course) and fucking rose pedals on the bed. Zayn isn't sure if he's touched or if he wants to laugh. Possibly both.

"Are you wooing me?" Zayn asks, walking toward the bed as Harry watches. "Or are you wooing your own body?"

"Yes," Harry says, nodding as Zayn's longer hair falls in his face. He pushes it back with a hand like he does in his own body. "Honestly, I just felt like candles, and then I couldn't resist the rose pedals when I found them."

Zayn snorts and sits on the bed. "Charmer."

Harry kisses him again, pressing him into the mattress, and wow, Harry's body definitely likes that. Many of Zayn's preferences feel more amorphous, shifting depending on who he's with and what kind of mood he's in, but Harry's body seems just as confident as Harry does.

"Good?" Harry asks, but he's smiling like he knows just how good it is.

Zayn slips out from under Harry and moves up the bed. He doesn't close the entire distance. Maybe he can't work his body quite like Harry can work his own, but he suspects he knows what other kinds of things Harry likes.

"Think it would be better if you pinned me down," Zayn says casually.

Harry's borrowed eyes darken. Harry crawls up the bed, and Zayn puts his borrowed arms over his head, smiling when he goes a little breathless.

They both gasp when Harry wraps fingers around the extended wrists and presses down, Zayn because Harry's body loves it, and Harry because he really likes what he's seeing.

"What..." Zayn has to take a breath. "Like, you want to tell me what to do? Make me beg? Call me a good boy?"

"Good boy," Harry says in Zayn's voice. It sounds like how Zayn would say it, and Zayn feels what Harry would feel, a spike of pleasure so acute that Zayn struggles under Harry's grip. Harry leans down to bite gently at Zayn's - usually Harry's - nipples, and Zayn genuinely whimpers.

"Make me take it," Zayn says, biting Harry's lip. "Flip me over."

Harry shivers at that, and Zayn's so curious about all this. Where does what their bodies like stop and what they like end? Is there a difference? Is there any way to tell?

He loses the thought as Harry pushes at him, and Zayn rolls over, sticking his naked arse into the air. It feels so...extra being in this body, having these additional inches of height that he doesn't need, but it's almost better knowing that Zayn has the extra length and Harry doesn't, but Harry's absolutely got a hold on Zayn right now regardless. It would be hard to break away, but not impossible.

Speaking of hard, Zayn feels a hand on his - on Harry's - cock without knowing it's going to happen, and he jumps.

Zayn recognises the feel of his own hand, but he isn't connected to it, and it's...it's not the proper fit. He's used to the hand feeling just right with his own cock - or feeling different when he's the one moving his hand - but Harry's a bit bigger, and all of that together makes Zayn's head spin. Not in a bad way. If anything, it's exhilarating.

Just as exhilarating is the feel of Zayn's own cock at Harry's arse.

"Yeah," he breathes, startling a little at the sound of Harry's turned-on voice vibrating in his own head. He and Harry spent a day a few weeks ago singing just to hear how their own voices sounded that way - Zayn knew he had a nice voice, but it was different hearing it with Harry's ears - but even that isn't enough to prepare him for the way Harry sounds at a time like this.

Harry groans behind him in Zayn's voice, and Zayn can't help it; he laughs.

"What?" Harry asks, pausing his - Zayn's - hand.

"Keep going, don't..." Zayn trails off as Harry gets back to it. "Just. Sounds a bit ridiculous, yeah?"

"Heyyy."

"Not you, just like. My own voice."

Harry kisses Zayn's shoulder and eases back. "If I kept how stupid I sound from having sex, I'd never do it. Okay if I get a condom?"

Zayn uses the break from Harry's hands on him to stretch. Seriously, how tall does someone have to be? "You're not ridiculous." He laughs at how deep Harry's voice sounds when he says it, and Harry, poised naked by his nightstand, raises an eyebrow. "Right, I get it."

Harry grins back. Zayn likes the way Harry's smirk looks on Zayn's face, fond and predatory at the same time.

"You or me?" Harry asks, holding up the bottle of lube and using it to gesture at Zayn.

Zayn considers, holding up Harry's hand to look at the fingers. Fucking obscene in the best possible way, but he probably can't angle them well.

He has a good idea anyway. "First you, then me. But we switch the second time."

Harry grins. They've done this enough that it shouldn't be odd to see Harry's smile on Zayn's face, but it definitely is. "That's a lot for you."

Zayn shrugs. "I can take it."

He sits up and helps Harry adjust with a pillow under his hips. Zayn can't stop grinning while he does it. He knows how it looks, but hey, at least he's in Harry's body. He feels less self-conscious about smiling with Harry's lips, which might be one reason why he's always in a good mood after they've swapped for a while. Maybe there's something to Louis mocking Zayn when he gets too vain. (Zayn mocks Louis right back; it's not like Louis has a low-maintenance look.)

Harry's watching Zayn when Zayn puts lube on Harry's fingers and Zayn looks at Harry's fingers as he coats them. Fuck, but they're long. Zayn suspects they're both getting some nice surprises today.

"Ready?" Zayn asks Harry. Harry bites his lip - Zayn's lip - and looks bashful and intense at the same time. He nods, and Zayn kisses him, tastes his own mouth.

He rubs the pad of one of Harry's fingers around his own hole, laughing a little when Harry's legs shake and Harry makes a choked sound in surprised. Harry really has no idea what's coming.

"You don't mind if it gets intense, do you?" Zayn asks. Harry shakes his head. "I'm gonna try something, yeah? Just tell me if it's too much."

He says "trying something", but what he does is just what Zayn has all his partners do to him. He slides in one finger, works it for just a moment, and then eases another one. (Perrie is particularly adept at fingering, possibly the most out of anyone he's met.) The only difference is that he doesn't go for a third soon after that; Harry's fingers are so long and nimble that Zayn manages to get them lined up in all the nice ways before long. Harry throws Zayn's head back and cries out long and hard, and his cock goes from half-hard to full, slapping against his stomach.

"Like that?" Zayn asks innocently, pausing his fingers.

Harry throws one of Zayn's arms over his eyes. Zayn takes a moment to admire his own tattoos from a different angle. "Shut up," Harry says. "Fuck. If you don't put your cock in, I'm going to come before you can."

Zayn knows Harry isn't wrong, so he eases out Harry's fingers and gets the condom Harry fetched earlier. Harry's big, too. Good thing they're doing this more than once; Zayn really wants this from the other side. (He wants to try topping in his own body at some point, too, but there's plenty of time for that.)

He lines up and slides in as quickly as he dares. It's not that his body can't take it; Zayn doesn't want to hurt Harry's body, and this is a first for him.

Zayn doesn't know if it's because Harry's in Zayn's body and his body is super responsive or because Harry's just impatient - Zayn maybe suspects the latter - but Harry wiggles around until Zayn puts one of Harry's hands on his hips.

"Hold still," Zayn says firmly, the words rumbling in his chest. "Don't want to hurt you."

Harry shakes a little, but he nods and does his best to still. He still wiggles a bit more once Zayn's fully seated, but Zayn suspects Harry's trying to adjust.

"Good, yeah?" Zayn says.

"Tell me..." Harry pauses to catch his breath. "Tell me Perrie pegs you all the time."

"Wouldn't say all the time. But, like, a lot." It's an odd moment to smile about his fiancée when he's fucking a guy, but he can't help it. Honestly, it's helping him keep from coming early; the way Harry's squeezing around him as he gets used to him is a lot. "Can I?"

"Fuck. Please."

Zayn pulls out, making sure to watch as his own body takes Harry's cock. Zayn would be the first to admit he's vain, and he's just as quick to think that he looks really fucking good getting dicked. He's the one who gets off on seeing his own body getting fucked, so why not?

Harry, on the other hand, has his eyes squeezed shut, and he starts working Zayn's hand over his cock when Zayn thrusts back in. Zayn knows the feeling. He would never watch himself getting fucked in his own body because any stamina he has would fly out the window.

Actually, speaking of which...it's ridiculous, but they only fuck for a couple minutes before Zayn feels close to the edge. He stops and grits Harry's teeth. "Fuck," he breathes.

"Sorry," Harry says. "I've always been rather..."

Zayn kisses Harry to stop him. He doesn't mind, really. He wants to try this from the other end anyway, and if a quick one will settle Harry enough to get a longer go on his turn, Zayn is fine with it.

Harry still comes first in Zayn's body, though. While they're kissing, even; Zayn hasn't been moving Harry's hips at all. Harry pulls back from the kiss, looking utterly baffled.

"Good," Zayn says before Harry can start apologising again. "Wait, I'll just..."

He works Harry's hips a couple more times, and sure enough, he comes. It even feels a little different than when Zayn comes while he's fucking; it's more like a bright burst than the slow build Zayn's body does. Zayn definitely likes it, to say the least.

He pulls out and tosses the condom in the bin and yawns. "Nap before we switch?"

Harry's wiping Zayn's body with a tissue. He grins. "Love taking naps in your body. You really know how to sleep."

Zayn is really not surprised Harry's experienced his naps; Zayn sleeps very easily. But then, Harry does too. Zayn's fallen asleep upright in chairs when he's been in Harry's body before. At least he has a few moments' warning as he cuddles Harry and feels his own body smaller against a borrowed one, and he's warm as he slides under.

-

Zayn stirs in Harry's body; he wakes in his own on purpose after he notices Harry's still asleep. It's kinder to do sleepy switches this way, he thinks. Not that they've had any problems in the past, but he'd rather avoid them.

He's pleasantly sore, and he grins as his arse twinges when he shifts out of bed and makes for the loo. Maybe having the after effects without experiencing the cause isn't something he'd want to do all the time, but it's not so bad when he can remember how it felt to do the fucking.

Harry's stretching in bed when Zayn comes back. He grins and waves at Zayn, and for a second, it's odd to see Harry's expressions on his own face again. Harry's body never feels like it belongs to Zayn, but Zayn suspects Harry feels at home no matter where he is.

"Sleep well?" Zayn asks, climbing back on the bed so he can kiss Harry.

"Mmm," Harry agrees, running his hands up and down Zayn's back. "You really want another go? I could never get fucked back-to-back."

Zayn nods. "If you want one, anyway. Wouldn't blame you if you couldn't get it up after that."

Harry snorts and pulls Zayn on top of him. Harry's cock is already twitching back to life, and Zayn snogs Harry as he reaches to grip Harry's cock, feeling its length in his own hand. He wonders, for a moment, if they shouldn't have done it this way first. Establish a baseline before trying it the other way. It's weirder than it should be to feel Harry's cock without sensing the contact.

He pulls back from Harry. "Does this mess with your head at all?" he asks, gesturing between them.

"What, you and me shagging? Reckon most people thought we did this ages ago."

"I meant the swaps."

Harry shrugs. "Dunno. Guess I just think it's fun."

It doesn't surprise Zayn that Harry answers that way; out of the two of them, Zayn's more likely to get in his own way, get stuck in his own head. That's probably why they both get along with the likes of Louis and Niall.

"Wait," Harry says. "Was this bad? You're all right?"

"Oh, definitely." Zayn nods firmly. "Just trip over me own thoughts sometimes, I suppose."

Harry smiles. He has such a lovely, genuine smile. Zayn feels happier when he leans down to kiss Harry again.

They spend a few minutes cuddling. It's one of the things about being an adult that gets to have sex that surprises Zayn sometimes; the best parts aren't always during the actual fucking, but in the completely innocent things he gets to do naked with other adults in between. Pezza's breasts are great to rest on, for instance. Harry's pecs aren't much worse, either. He plays with Harry's hair, and Harry plays with his, and they laugh about shit they've done on tour and go for a snack and come back and start kissing again.

Things get heated from there, and Zayn feels more solidly in his body when they do.

It doesn't hurt that Zayn gets to lean on Harry's wrists and whisper that he's a good boy and watch Harry get flushed and happy in response. It also doesn't hurt that they work it out that Harry can lube up his fingers and slip them inside Zayn with one hand while Zayn pins Harry's other hand to the bed. It's amazing what kinds of things get people off, Zayn thinks as Harry moves to a second finger and looks amazed when Zayn cries out over him. How pieces that wouldn't seem to fit on the surface really do, in the end.

"You really like this," Harry says with surprise.

"You...fuck, right there. Yeah." Zayn breathes through the pleasure. It's almost overwhelming. "You liked it when you tried it, remember?"

"I know, but it wasn't..." Harry's eyes narrow in focus as he slows the pace of his hand. "It was so much, I couldn't really tell where it was coming from."

"Suppose we'll have to do it a few different times in the future. Get you really used to it."

"Suppose so." Harry pulls his hand out and reaches for a condom. "How do you feel about riding me?"

Zayn grins.

They get arranged, and it's really good this way because Zayn can pin Harry's hands beside his head - he's too tall for Zayn to pin them over his head, but judging by the way Harry's breath catches, he likes this just as much - and then he can tell him to hold them there, which Harry does, as Zayn gets Harry's cock lined up and sinks down on it.

"Fuck," Zayn cries out, drawing out the middle vowel, as he works Harry's cock in. He sees what Harry means about it being a lot. Zayn's definitely got a bit of a thing for size, and Harry's not unrealistically big, but he's bigger than Zayn's done before, and his body is completely ridiculous over how good it feels. There's even that hint of soreness from before, that reminder that the body's been here before even if Zayn hasn't, and somehow, that just makes it better.

When he's fully seated, he puts his hands back on Harry's wrists. Harry's hair is sticking a bit to his forehead, so Zayn lifts one hand to nudge it away, and Harry stays in place until Zayn's back in place.

"Good boy," Zayn says, and it sounds...well, sort of ridiculous in his own voice. But Harry shivers and rolls his hips up, which makes good feelings spark through Zayn's body in response, so apparently it works for Harry, at least.

Zayn shakes his head. "Stay still until I say."

Harry takes a deep breath, gaze a bit distant as he collects himself, and nods, relaxing into the bed a bit.

Zayn uses the control he has to do most of the work at first, going as fast as he pleases until he tires and slows to a gentle grind. It's how he likes to do things, really. Work off some of his energy, and then relax a bit while someone else takes the slack. Harry always has more energy than Zayn, or, at least, it feels like more. In his time in Harry's body, he's often jumped around Harry's kitchen just because he can. It explains why Harry's always so all over the place onstage.

But he tires before long, and the way his body's slowly building to orgasm's making him clumsy, so Zayn guides Harry's hands to Zayn's hips and says, "Help me out, love."

Harry grins and thrusts up as Zayn puts a hand around his cock. Zayn comes first, and it's so intense and delicious; his body's shaking with aftershocks even when the orgasm's technically over and he's easing off Harry's still-hard cock. Fucking amazing.

"You want help?" Zayn asks, hugging himself a little but nodding at Harry's cock as Harry takes off the condom.

Harry shakes his head. He plays with his cock a bit, far more than Zayn could manage on himself if he was as close to coming as Harry was, and somehow manages to bring himself close a couple times before he comes all over his stomach, crying out loudly. Zayn's very glad Harry didn't come inside him; it's a beautiful sight.

"So," Harry says a while later, after they've showered and Zayn's ready to go home and share all the details with Perrie. "We're doing this again, yeah?"

Zayn grins. "Definitely."